. . . and to be fair, five things I like about you. This post was inspiried by Thora's lists about what she likes, dislikes, and misses about Virginia and Utah. My list is restricted to five things I like and dislike about living in Mapleton.
Five Dislikes:
1. You have to drive to Springville or Spanish Fork to take care of the basic needs of life, yet you live right next door to your neighbors in typical suburban fashion. Next time I live in the middle of nowhere, I really want to be in the middle of nowhere.
2. People still stare at me when I drive around in Mapleton. It's like they know I'm some sort of outsider and they need to make sure that I know that they know. All ages and types do this too - men, women, young people, old people, children. Matt thinks I'm crazy and makes fun of me, but it happened to my brother-in-law when he visiting last summer, so we know it's real.
3. I hate to be a witness to the urbanization of Mapleton. For example, there is a local feud between a dairy farm and the homeowners who built their big homes near the dairy. The homeowners want to close the dairy because the smell is a nuisance and somehow they have support from the city government. As my co-worker always says when he gets off the phone with students, "Stupid Idiots!". Newer residents think they're moving to an idealized country with no dairy farms, sheep, open burns, small lots or ticks and when it's not so they complain and throw money around until someone changes it for them. It makes me sad.
4. The ward in Mapleton drives me crazy simply because it's so vanilla. There is one interesting family who home-school, have an awesome family bluegrass band, and are vegans. So they're pretty much left to themselves by the rest of the ward (I already knew them from bluegrass so we're pretty good friends). This isn't to say that the ward is made up of bad people, just typical, uninteresting Utah Mormons. I suppose it's fair to realize that they take as little interest in me as I do in them, to the point most of them aren't really sure who I am (although its funny to me to be called in order of frequency David or Marya's daughter-in-law, Heidi's sister-in-law and finally Matt's wife). They also failed to get our records last summer when we lived in the ward, but when we moved back in January they told us that eight months was long enough time for us to be in the ward, so they would go ahead and get them (and that took them two months). Here are some of my favorite conversations that have driven me mad with the ward:
First Ward Member: "So you live with Heidi in that house?"
Me: "Yes."
1WM: "So its just the two of you?"
Me: "And my husband."
1WM: "Oh!" and she scurries off shocked
Second Ward Member: "I know Marya's done alot of geneaology. Do you have your five-generation pedigree done?"
Me: "Yes I do."
2WM: "Yeah, its so nice for you guys that Marya's done alot of your geneaology." (Why would my mother-in-law do my family's geneaology? Or why would she have thought that in my five months of marriage that Marya would go out and do all of my geneaology? Or does she think since Matt and I had barbeque and bluegrass at our open house that we're related?)
The following conversation I've had with several different ward members:
Various Ward Member: "How are your parents doing?"
Me: "Fine, they are staying busy and [fill in with time appropriate comment like doing alot of yardwork or preparing for a visit from relatives]."
VWM: "So how do they like [Qatar, Bahrain, Darfur, Saudia Arabia, etc depending on the person]?"
Me: "Actually my parents live in Arizona, but Matt's parents like Qatar quite alot."
VWM: "Oh, well that's nice.
I know, I'm probably too rude to live in this ward. Oh well.
5. They're is no leash law in Mapleton. Now I'm sounding like a new resident who hates the real country, but I feel like a number of the dogs in Mapleton aren't trained right to have no leash law. We've got many car and people-chasing dogs. Ok, only one car-chaser that I know of, but usually I run into a least one unhappy dog when I walk around Mapleton. They poop in our yard and bark and growl at you if you're on the sidewalk near their house, the other side of the street, or even if you're in your own yard and they're out trolling the neighborhood. I don't mind the chickens wandering around, but the dogs drive me crazing.
Five Likes:
1. It's close to the mountains. We have a really nice view of the mountains from the kitchen window and backyard which is a delight.
2. It's still fairly rural, especially compared to the rest of the valley. It has a nice fresh smell (or *fresh* smell, depending on the day), there are farms and animals everywhere and its not uncommon to see people going down the road on their horses. And there are a number of people fighting to keep Mapleton that way by restricting growth up the mountain and setting a minimum lot size.
3. We live in a nice, normal neighborhood with nice, normal neighbors. I wouldn't have thought much of this except that we moved here after living in the tree streets where the neighbors were not necessary nice or normal. Here no one cares that we're students and they don't have to prove the point that they're not students by keeping their yards fastidiously clean. But it's not white-trash either, just a relaxed quiet neighborhood.
4. The ward may be vanilla, but its not malignant. Again, this wouldn't have meant as much, except coming from our anti-student, anti-renter Provo ward. The people here might not have taken much notice of us, but it's not because we are the lepers of the ward by being "students". In this ward I've made some good friendships with a couple of the older ladies (I really do mean older, one of them has great-grandkids in the ward) who have been very nice to me. I also love my Primary calling! I'd forgotten just how much fun Primary is and the time at church just flies now.
5. It's where I'm suppose to be. Ok, I know it's sort-of a cop out, but I couldn't think of a better one.
Living in Mapleton on the whole has been a challenge for me in various ways. I associate Mapleton with my darker times of being freshly graduated, unemployed and feeling isolated. Thanks Thora for helping me realize there are some things I really like about Mapleton. Without being too cheesy, I'm really blessed to live here.
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5 comments:
As a life-time Utahner--save for stints outside of the country and that one month in Minnesota--it's always interesting to hear what thoughtful people have to say about my home county. I've always thought Mapleton a sorta goofy place. It's different than any other small Utah County town because of the crazy distribution of wealth. Most of us from the Fork just saw it as the "wealthy part" and were always surprised to hear about regular people living there.
One of the crazy things about small Utah towns is that it is really hard to break into them. People here are too traditional and refuse to allow anything but their own brand of vanilla in. I complain about all of those Californians and Idahoans moving into the Fork, but really I'm fine with it. It's been really good for SF to have people who aren't related to me infusing the gene pool.
Small towns can be really charming, but when you differ from the mold, you're gonna get scowled at. There's no way to avoid it. People are gonna say dumb things. But don't worry, they say all of these dumb things to life-timers as well. I know: personal experience.
But I'm glad that you've also found ways to enjoy Mapleton. People in my home county actually really need people like you and Matt forcing them to think outside of their paradigm, as you two are both good people, but different in some ways from them. It makes people, sometimes unwillingly, realize that culture and opinions aren't necessarily eternal.
Yay for Primary.
That comment was way too long. Sorry 'bout that.
I'd completely overlooked the "rich" part of Mapleton because we live in the "poor"part. I believe Matt told me once that he had to explain to people at Springville High that he lived in the poor part of Mapleton. It's funny to me that Mapleton has that reputation, because certainly other neighboring cities have as many big houses or more (particularly Springville up Hobble Creek canyon).
You're right about the ward, though. People say stupid things anywhere. In my home ward there are people who can't tell my sister and me apart. I would think it would be like telling an apple from an orange (we're not K&G my any means).
And amen to culture not being eternal (or a saving doctrine)!
ps I like long comments, as you see.
i read your entry out loud last night. stick said that she liked mapleton, but also went to the student ward, so she didn't have the same experiences. she did say that she liked the drive there because of the nice sunflowers.
gretchen said that she was "neutral."
I appreciated you list, and am glad I was able to inspire you. My home ward in Utah was very diverse, it had many polynesians and some hispanic. But it was in "inner city" Salt Lake. I must admit, I think that Mapleton's mountains are the best of Utah, which for me is saying a lot.
pompous. sorry...it's true.
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